This month, I had the honour of attending Dr. David R. Hawkins‘ last lecture. It was incredible. I was moved to tears on a number of occassions. The subject was, “Love” and that was a perfect and very powerful note to end on. Because, really, “all you need is love”. As long as you are working on your capacity to be loving then you are doing the greatest work that world could ever need.

As a devoted follower I am very familiar with his work and I’ve listened to lectures from many years ago. This lecture didn’t offer anything new as far as content. But, he’s not really about the content, anyway. His words are extremely important for helping the mind to shift but this event was pretty much just our last chance to be in the same room as him. And what a room it was. So much incredible loving energy.

In the lecture portion someone read out the slides point by point about love and lovingness. Then Susan would stop and ask him questions to clarify the points. Susan is his wife who always sits up on stage with him to either help with muscle-testing or to repeat something that he wasn’t able to hear on his own. As he’s gotten older and less physically able to hear and speak as he has in the past, she’s taken on more of the role of fascilitator in lectures and question periods. Doc is in his mid-eighties and his health is not that great. He couldn’t stand unassisted, he couldn’t hear anyone except Susan (I also have this with my hearing-impaired girlfriend. She needs her hearing-aid with everyone but me.) and the lights also impaired his vision. These two were also being very cute as they talked and gushed about how much they love each other. They showed a DVD of photos of their life and opened themselves up to the audience more than they’ve done before. I could tell the audience was very appreciative.

The main focus for the lecture was, Be Lovingness. That’s all. Just be it. And everything you do and say and think and feel will come from a place of Love. Over and over this was reiterated in various different ways.

For the second half of the day, I stood in line for 2 hours to ask a question, but in the hour that they did the Q & A the line barely moved. It was nice chatting to the people in line though. I was being a bit shy and spent most of the time reading my book but a few forward people got me talking. It was a bit frustrating listening to the questions and non-questions from the people who made it up on stage. But, then as I mentioned to the people around me, it was a great chance to practise being loving and to surrender negativity. We laughed.

In the past, like 10 years ago, when Doc first started doing lectures the questions were generally applicable to every else in one way or another and it was interesting to hear what answers came from the various inquiries. These days, all sorts of spiritual zealots know about how amazing he is and most people who went up on stage would ask him for a blessing. It seemed a little selfish, if you ask me. They were taking up the time of 3000 people so that they could get a personal blessing from this Master. One person kept asking him to send her back into the silence like he did the last time she saw him. He was quite frustrated by the questions and by not being able to see or hear them properly. Other questions that kept coming up were either about a personal need (health, school, work) or some vague question like, “how to I get rid of doubt” or “tell me how to overcome obstacles to God”. He’s say, “what doubt?”, “what obstacles?” Again, the best part about the Q & A was letting it be what it was and surrendering my own frustration. There were some good questions. But, I don’t actually remember them. It’s entirely possible that some of the questions and answers resonated with a large portion of the audience. To me, it was just one long gong-show. One of the most entertaining parts was when Doc called a 40-something victim of childhood abuse that she was lazy for not resolving her issues with the trauma by now. He certainly has a way with words. But, he clarified that forgiveness takes a split second and if she hasn’t forgiven her abuser by now then she’s simply choosing not to.

After the questions they did testimonials. Which was actually quite good. It gave Doc a chance to check out and to come in and out to hear the stories and their expressions of gratitude for everything he’s done. And for the audience, it was nice to hear all the positive experiences his work has had on people. Lots of love. Then at one point Doc hit the wall and couldn’t sit there anymore. This began the ending of the lecture, the most incredible part of the whole day, his blessing to the audience.

He stood up, as did everyone else and said his blessing, then returned to his wheelchair with Susan close by as bagpipes came out and onto the stage. He loves the bagpipes and he said they calibrate at 500, the level of Love. I was pretty much bawling my eyes out the whole time. The energy of Love that was emanating from the stage and the whole event center was overwhelming. I gladly took it all in. I didn’t feel sad or even particularly joyful, the tears just kept streaming. It was simply a consequence of being in the presence of such love. It was beautiful. Music played and Doc poured out his love to us. He stood up for one final goodbye. And then he was gone.

I was left reeling and totally blissed out from the experience. I didn’t want to go home (to my friends place where I was staying). So I went for a scenic drive through the mountains, saw some incredible views, and wound around intense turns on a beautiful mountain road. I was heading towards Sedona but by the time I got there it was dark. I saw the beautiful surroundings and then darkness. So I hit the highway and headed home. Amazing amazing day. I was tired, but so so happy. I look forward to always be striving for lovingness in everything I do. Thank you Dr. Hawkins.

I’ve decided to go and get lost in desert for a week. Starting this Friday I’m going to spend 6 days in Arizona. It’ll be my first time there and I’ll be exposed to some climate and terrain that I’m not used to. The desert part is appealing to me, but the heat makes me a bit nervous.

I’m going to Dr. David R. Hawkins’ last lecture. After this he’s going to be limiting his public events to short gatherings or pre-recorded seminars on the Internet.

For the last couple of years I’ve been wanting to go see The Doc. I kept thinking that I couldn’t wait because I didn’t know when he might stop doing them. He’s an old man, after all. Then when they announced that this would be his last lecture, I knew I had to go. Thankfully, everything fell into place perfectly and I’m going to begin my pilgrimage this Friday. After the lecture, I’m going to spend some time with a friend and just let the whole experience seep into my awareness.

I’m so excited for this.

Lately, I’ve been working on devoting my mind to transcending itself for the purpose of getting closer to God. To get closer to the realization that we are one with God and that nothing and nobody is apart from us, including God.

This is a pretty tall order for the mind, because it’s the mind that’s the obstacle. But, it’s our minds in which we live on a daily basis. I understand exercises that can help with transcending the mind such as meditation, surrendering our thoughts, and  focusing on the moment. And I do those things whenever possible.

What if we could come up with things in the mind that lead us to understanding? We read spirituality books. We love to hear the words of Wayne Dyer, Eckhart Tolle and Deepak Chopra. They have the words that make sense. The words they express are signposts for getting beyond the mind. Signposts leading to the Source of Life. And lately, my mind has been trying to come up with it’s own signposts. Or even, I might say, doorways of understanding.

I’m not there yet. I want to come up with a metaphor that will help me to understand the nature of God/Source/Universe and how I fit in. I want to understand in my puny little mind how it is that we’re all one, that we’re all connected to God and to each other.

In Dr. David R. Hawkins’ work (which I love) he uses the metaphor of the sun to depict God and the clouds as our ego. And that our ego is simply an obstruction and once we clear it away then the sun shines forth. It didn’t suddenly arrive, it was always there and simply becomes visible by removing that which is blocking it. I love this metaphor and my mind is using that type of conceptualization to figure out my own little mental construction of oneness and allness.

In the Dr. Hawkins metaphor, the sun is like the higher Self, it’s us. The part of ourselves that’s always there but is blocked by the ego. But, in my new metaphor I think of the sun as God Itself, the Source of All-That-Is. And I think of humans and our higher Self as the rays of sunshine. This idea helps my mind to understand how we are actually God or another way of saying it, not apart from God. Can you separate out the Sun from the Sunshine? Our soul, our Self, the energy that is spirit which gives us life is what I think of as the sunshine. But, here is where my mind is having trouble. I haven’t flushed out the metaphor quite yet. I’m still working on it. Where does the human body fit into this?

One possible extension of this metaphor is that our human selves is that which the sunshine illuminates. A ray of sunshine casts its light on a mountain top and through the cycles of the universe and the evolution of life that mountain top someday becomes a river bed or vice-versa. Is the ray of sunshine the mountain top? Of course not. Does the changing nature of the earth change the nature of sunshine? Nope. The ray of sun continues to shine forth. (The sun is literally part of this cycle of the universe so of course it is actually changing too, but, this is just a metaphor for our little minds.)

Writing this out right now is actually helping me to conceptualize this a bit better. I see other people as illuminated beings of light. Some are better lit than others. But, all are lit by the light of “God” or the “Sun”. The spirit that is within them is but a beam of sunlight. The same beam of sunlight that shines in me. Well, a different beam, but all beams of light are the same and all come from the same source and are not separate from that source. Simply Sun on it’s way to illuminating life.

I think I need to leave the metaphor there for now. What do you think about this perspective? How would your change it to fit your own mental perception of Oneness?

Lately I’ve been finding myself getting really annoyed at people who complain. Right now the most complaining that I’m experiencing from other people is about the weather. The weather isn’t the way they want or expect and it feels like everybody I come across is complaining about it. And it’s pissing me off!

I know, that’s not very Zen of me, is it? You’re right. And I’m struggling with that. I am consciously trying to have peace within, be grateful for what-is, see the beauty in everything and generally get closer to Source. And when I hear these petty complaints I just want to shake them. Don’t you see how amazing everything is? Don’t you see how stupid it is to complain about the freaking weather? And then I just have to laugh at myself.

I’ve been holding my tongue. So far, I’ve made it through the complaints without telling anyone off or explaining to them how “wrong” they are for feeling like crap about the weather. And I’m grateful for that level of self-restraint. Wouldn’t I just be complaining about those complainers if I spoke up? After all the phenomenon of complaining about the weather is just as systematic as the weather itself. Only with not nearly as much organized intelligence as the climate possesses.

To seek an answer to my issue I went within. I meditated and asked myself, by way of one of my inner guides, how can I deal with this annoyance towards the weather complainers? The answer came quickly: Forgive them, for they know not what they do.

That’s a quote from Jesus, but it’s one of those universal truths. We humans rarely know what we’re doing.

And it felt very true for me and for this situation at hand. Forgive them. On a day in mid-summer when the rain falls and gives life to the trees, grass, flowers and ourselves, the beaches empty as the clouds protect us from the intensity of the sun and the people get mad that their leisure time is ruined, forgive them. They don’t see what’s great about this day. All they see is loss. A loss of summer. A loss of sunshine. But, there is no such thing as loss. And the sun does not owe us anything. In times of drought they will be praying for a rainy summer. Forgive them, for they know not what they do.

That’s my answer. Forgiveness. And truly, it’s the answer to everything, but for today I need an answer to how to deal with those annoying complainers. I can do that. They’re still learning about completeness and the truth about loss. We can’t lose our summer to the rain. And it’s okay that people can’t see that. I forgive them. And I pray for peace within their hearts. That’s what we all want in the end isn’t it? Peace in our hearts.

Here, I’ll go first.

The ideal world goal would be salvation for all, wouldn’t you think? Salvation would mean that we’re all saved. Which would mean that we’re all in a state of peace and love. At least that’s what I think it means.

Growing up Christian I was taught that I needed to make Jesus Christ my own personal saviour or else I wasn’t going to go to heaven. And I learned that salvation was only possible because Jesus died on the cross and rose from the dead and all that. We sang songs about salvation and were very proud of ourselves for having heard about our man, Jesus, because otherwise we would’ve been lost lambs on our way to the slaughter.

Of course as I grew into my teenage years having this father figure of whom I needed to obey in order to get my reward was the perfect paradigm to rebel against. Eventually, I simply threw it all away as anything real or necessary. And frankly, I deemed it all a bit naïve and arrogant to assume that Christians had the right idea and everyone else was misguided. In fact, it became very clear that Christianity was probably one of the most misguided religions in the world.

Fast forward nearly 20 years and I pray to God regularly, I am delighted that Jesus showed up on Earth 2000 years ago, and I embrace a lot of the characteristics of Christianity that are at the core of the religion, like loving kindness. I don’t go to church and I don’t want to. I believe in no-religion and embrace peace and love and joy for all human beings – even the sinners. I guess this is also what the Christians say but you just don’t see them acting on it much. Then again, you probably won’t see me acting on it either because I am private about my spirituality and motivations for loving kindness.

What are my motivations? Salvation for all. It’s true. Talk about arrogance though, right? I think that’s why I feel it’s important for me to be writing all this anonymously. I don’t want my ego to get in the way of what I feel is my true path. I believe, through my own inner knowing and from what I’ve come to learn from other spiritual teachers, that by seeking higher consciousness for myself I will be contributing to elevating the consciousness of everyone. Thus, my own loving kindness, my non-judgment, my path to enlightenment, will be a catalyst for the salvation for every human being on earth.

Maybe that sounds strange. When I see it written out it looks similar to what a power seeking leader would say to influence the actions of a large group of people: “Follow me and you will be saved!” But, that’s not what I’m saying. And I’m not saying that “only” my enlightenment will save the world. And I’m not even saying that I will become enlightened in this lifetime. It could take a couple more centuries for all I know. But, the simple fact that I, a North American middle-class starving-artist white lesbian from a christian background, am on a path that unites me with Source means that many many others like me and unlike me at all are also on the same path. And the more of us that are on this path then the more of them will also be on this path. And eventually us and them will be one. That is salvation for all.

My lesson today in A Course in Miracles is, “Salvation for the world depends on me.” It’s a beautiful little phrase. When taken in the appropriate context, that being from the perspective of the spiritual seeker, it has so many beautiful layers of hope and expectation for love and peace. Imagine every single person in the world reading that phrase and taking in its truth. Imagine if today everyone in the world contemplated that thought. If everyone knew that phrase then it would literally be true wouldn’t it? The salvation of the world does depend on me, and it depends on you and it depends on every conscious being alive on earth. But, what can one person do? One person can put a thought into the world and invite others to hold that thought as well. If I withdraw my contribution of thinking this thought, then I am stopping the flow of salvation. I am withdrawing the power of the thoughts that we think and withholding salvation from the world. Salvation for the world depends on me. I will be contemplating that all day long today. Join me if you so desire.

I read an exerpt from “A New Earth” by Eckhart Tolle recently. It said something to the effect of… (I can’t find the exact passage anymore) when you surrender you come to realize that you don’t live life, life lives you. This book has a million pieces of gems that say so much and this line really struck me.

I’ve been studying various spiritual teachers and the most common thing that comes up for achieving peace, love, joy, and enlightenment is surrender. There’s something about surrender that’s just really hard to take. My mind is so sure that “I” am the one that makes things happen in my life. “I” am the one that ensures my own survival. If I simply surrender how will I achieve anything, how will I stay healthy, how will I create, how will I survive? These are all abstract thoughts. The mind has this perspective but logic does step in and settle the mind into trusting that everything is really going to be okay and a little surrender doesn’t hurt. The part that’s hard to figure is making surrender a lifestyle.

Activism is a very important part of the queer community. People take a lot of pride in standing up and fighting and “making change”. So what does surrender mean to the activist community? I don’t know and I would never suggest that activists need to be different. I think everything is perfect as it is and that includes the people who fight for change. But, back to surrender. It’s a frightening concept.

The image that came to mind when I read the line, “life lives you” was that of a sailboat. I’m into sailing these days so I thought about it in regards to sailing (I sail little one or two person dinghies).

To say that I live life, is like saying that I power the sailboat. I steer it, yes. But, when there is no wind then there is no power. Without any wind, when I move the tiller it has no affect on the boat whatsoever. This sailboat metaphor really hits home for me. As the skipper I am a decision-maker. I have free will. I can steer it, I can adjust the sails. But, to get anywhere I need to surrender to the power of the wind. An example of fighting against the wind – rather than surrendering – would be trying to sail directly into the wind – it’s not possible. You have to be just off the wind and zig-zag back and forth to get upwind. That’s just the way it is. I can choose to point the sailboat right into the wind if I want to, but I will be stalled. No movement whatsoever.

So, I’m taking this metaphor and relating it to living life with God. (Aside: These days I refer to God in my thoughts as “God, etc.” because to me that means, Life, my Guardian Angel, All-That-Is, Self, Source, Universe, you know, etc.) I am here inhabiting a body and I don’t live life, per se. Life lives me. And that’s amazing because Life is everything and it knows the pathways of least-resistance. It knows where the Love is. It knows where the Joy is. My mind…not so much. Here is where surrender comes into play. My mind wants to live life. My mind thinks that “I” know what’s best for myself. But, imagine if I just “let go and let God”, as they say.

I could say to God etc., “I want to experience Joy and Peace (or, using the sailboat metaphor: I want to reach that island over there). Show me how to head in the right direction based on where I’m at right now and my physical capacity to get there in this lifetime. I will pay close attention to the signs you reveal and make choices to the best of my ability.”

Sailboat metaphor: I choose my destination – the island – and surrender to the power of the wind. I pay close attention to which direction the wind is coming from and how powerful it is. I will make choices about which direction to turn and how to adjust my sails based on my physical ability, the boat’s capacity, obstacles in front of me, signs of the boats responsiveness, and my knowledge and practise up to that moment. Depending on my when the sun sets and what the weather is like, I may or may not get to the island that day. I may have to turn back and try another day. But, I will make those choices to the best of my ability and surrender to What-Is.

I welcome Life to live me and vow to make choices on what direction to take to the best of my ability. Let’s do this thing!

The other day a friend of mine posted a youtube video about Robert Anton Wilson talking about people’s perceptions of reality being it’s own reality tunnel:

I don’t know the context of the talk and I’m not familiar with the man although after a quick wiki search my interest is definitely peaked.

The message is very simple: We all see the world differently because we look at it through our own perceptions. But, it seemed so profound to me. I’m not sure if others see this as so obvious. We see the world through our own perception, then we interpret that perception based on an infinite number of factors and call that reality, which Wilson refers to as a Reality Tunnel. And we all have our own Reality Tunnels.

This is where I find compassion for the religious zealots, homophobes, republican/conservative extremists, people who run red lights, mean people, etc. It’s not that any one of them are “stupid” or deliberately trying to undermine your happiness. They just see things differently. They’re in their own Reality Tunnel. And so am I and so are you. What would it take to force me out of my Reality Tunnel and into one that matches someone else’s? Shame? Guilt? Not likely. It’ll just add shame and guilt to my tunnel.

Right at the end of this brief clip is the part that I find the most interesting.

“Every reality tunnel might tell us something interesting about our world, if we’re willing to listen.”

Stop and pay attention without judgment to a couple of different reality tunnels today. There are as many out there as there are people. But, don’t get overwhelmed, just make yourself aware of the different reality tunnels that around you, especially your own. And then just become curious about the world. What do these reality tunnels tell me about the world I live in. Sometimes it might be depressing and sometimes it might be joyful. But, I encourage you to look without judgment. It is what it is. Why not try looking at what-is with full awareness from your own reality tunnel and see if you can get a glimpse of another person’s tunnel.

(I’m trying to figure this all out for myself, as well, from my own tunnel and it’s all very complex and beautiful. Thanks for reading. I welcome comments and interpretations)

Last week on Grey’s Anatomy, the character Miranda Bailey said something that I loved. It was in reference to another character’s parents who were giving her a hard time for marrying a woman and having a baby “out of wedlock”. She said, “[The disapproving parents] just haven’t caught up to God, yet.”

I feel like as a whole we humans are slowly but surely catching up to God. Even to have a mainstream tv show that says, God is in you and in me and in between you and me, I think is revolutionary. But, not everyone feels this way about God and spirituality. There is still a lot of catching up to do. There are a lot of people who are behind.

Another interesting thing I heard last week was on an audio recording of Deepak Chopra’s “Book of Secrets”. He was talking about one’s spiritual growth and that the spiritual path (or “catching up to God”) doesn’t need to be a struggle. He says, you would never expect a 4 year old to struggle to turn 5.

Dr. Hawkins also says something this. He says we can only be that which we are. And he says that being more enlightened or having a higher level of consciousness isn’t “better than”. Everyone’s current level is appropriate because that’s where they are. And simply by working on oneself, a spiritual seeker can elevate the whole world.

Because we are always able to make choices on a moment to moment basis, people seem to think that other people should choose better. They think that they shouldn’t be so concerned about money, that they should respect the earth and support those less fortunate. I notice this a lot in the queer community. There’s a lot of righteousness. We’re fortunate to be outsiders. As outsiders we can see that people need help, need services and resources. As outsiders we gain a perspective that reveals the complexity of poverty and addiction and disability and a whole host of other social issues that affect many people. As women we are caring and feel compelled to help. But, as strong characters we get angry at the people in power who do nothing to help and even hinder those who work so hard to help “those less fortunate”.

But, you know what, the politicians and especially the system that they all work in just haven’t caught up to God, yet. And they deserve our compassion just as much as the drug addict who chooses to harm himself. Everybody needs compassion.

I was going for a walk the other day and I began to have a conversation in my head to someone who was angry about a social issue and I was imagining this conversation steering towards appropriate ways to be an activist. Personally, I don’t go to rallies or get angry about atrocities or yell and fight about issues that are important. I simply do my best to catch up to God and be a loving and good person. So, as I was walking and having this imaginary conversation I asked the universe, “what is the best way to affect change in the world?” Not long after an answer came to me. What would be a perfect world? What qualities does it have? Do you have those qualities? Can you? Do you try? Isn’t that the most important thing to focus on? That’s taken directly from the notebook that I stopped and wrote in when these thoughts came to me. Interesting how my “answer” was a bunch of questions.

I believe that compassion is the best way to fight in this world. And compassion needs to be for everyone – not just the down-trodden. Even the money-hungry disrespectful arrogant people who do their best to oppress us need compassion. They’re like 4 year-olds. Someday they’re going to turn 5. There’s no point in being angry about it or trying to shame them into being 5. They are 4.

Let’s focus on creating an environment that facilitates growth and evolution. Gandhi says, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” It’s so obvious and simple it’s easy to forget. Create your perfect world from within. If you want a compassionate world then see what happens when you extend that compassion to everyone and everything, rich and poor, the oppressed and the oppressors.

This post is about pain. But, not severe pain. More like, everyday, mild, “I feel like I want to complain” kind of pain.

This weekend I had my first all-day outdoor activity day of the year. I took a sailing class and we had the benefit of sailing two-person dinghies for nearly 5 hours straight.

I decided to ride my bike because it was sunny and Spring and it’s actually faster (compared to the bus). This was another first of the year for me. Of course my tires were pretty much flat and pedalling uphill to the gas station to get air felt like the hardest thing I’d ever done. I began huffing and puffing and ending up walking it most of the way. Eventually I got the air in my tires and with a nice downhill slope got some air in my lungs, as well. In my mind, I’m thinking “damn, this is hard, I don’t know if this was such a good idea.”. Then I came upon a marathon in progress. At the place I passed them I saw a sign that said, “24 km”. I don’t know if that’s what they ran already or what they had left, but, suddenly rolling down the street on my two wheels felt really easy.

So, before I turn this into a long drawn-out sad story and I end up missing the whole point of this post, let me get right to it. The day was amazing, but the sailing was very physically hard. We were capsizing and righting our boats multiple times and it was very difficult. It requires a lot of upper body strength and over the winter (and over the years) I’ve lost plenty of that. I did the best I could. I hurled my body onto the boat, the daggerboard, the hull, over the sides, under the sides, you name it. And I had a great time. After all was said and done it was time to bike home. I was exhausted. I knew I was going to be feeling it in my muscles the next day. And I slowly headed home.

Which brings me to my point. For the last couple of days I have been feeling really uncomfortable -  in pain – good pain: sore muscles kind of pain. Besides that I developed some pretty nasty bruises all over my arms and legs. I bruise fairly easily so they look horrible and feel tender. We all experience this uncomfortable feeling in our bodies, some more than others. I’m fortunate to be a generally healthy person and usually quite free of pain so I’m doing my best to take a lesson from this now. Because it will pass before I know it.

The thing that always happens when pain comes up is my mind focuses on it. I hear my thoughts telling me, “this hurts, that looks horrible, it’s swollen, etc”. Dr. Hawkins says that we actually only ever experience (feel) that which we resist. And boy, am I resisting, and hurting.

So, I am trying to cut off the resistance at the pass. I simply surrender my constant evaluations regarding how it looks, how it feels, when it might get better or how it might affect the day. I let it all go. I decide to let my body be in pain and sit with that reality without any judgment or labelling or evaluating.

Instantly I felt better, euphoric almost. Not all the time, mind you. The feeling of being uncomfortable inevitably returns just as strong as ever. But, once again I surrender and I feel fine again. I’m not sure if I’m expressing this experience in a way that makes sense to others, but, every time I successfully surrender the pain I felt a gain in confidence that I can do it again. And not only do it for muscle pain and tender tissue, but tiredness, lethargy, or apathy of work and tasks that need to be done. Even writing this post has its own level of discomfort. My mind wants to complain, quit, take a nap, watch TV, do something else, anything else. However, the exact same process of surrender that I achieve for my pain I can also achieve with writing. Anything, really: negative thinking, judgment, anger, sadness, things like that. Like the pain, it feels uncomfortable. And the relief is amazing. Sometimes it facilitates a joyous feeling and other times it simply takes me to a place of neutrality. Which frankly, feels amazing relative to the pain.

A really important part of my path right now is to pay attention to what my mind is doing. And what I’ve noticed is when I’m feeling uncomfortable, in my head I’m telling a story to someone about how bad I feel – complaining, basically. Even though I might never tell people or maybe just one person who’s close to me, my mind is constantly having this conversation with various people. So I assigned a short-hand for that one, too.

“Story. Surrender.”

That’s it. That’s all it takes. I see it for what it is: just a thought about how badly I’m feeling in the form of a story I’m sharing with someone I know, which amplifies my feelings and gives a certain reality to my pain (even though the story is all still in my head). Luckily for us we get plenty of opportunities to feel physical pain. Use those times to see what your mind does. Who are you talking to in your mind? What are you saying? Are you amplifying the pain with your thoughts? Try telling a different story or better yet, no story at all. Objectively, your body is free to be broken and in pain and experiencing whatever is going on with it. But, your mind can say otherwise. Pay attention. Surrender.

Present moment awareness is essentially the key to all aspects of personal development, spirituality, happiness, joy, creativity, you name it. And, lately I’ve been discovering the magic of being in the moment for getting shit done. Even things as simple as doing the dishes, tidying up the house, and, of course, sitting down to write a blog entry like I’m doing right now.

Starting is definitely a huge block to being productive and Leo Babauta at ZenHabits.net (the modern cultural use of Zen that I, too am appropriating) wrote an awesome post about How To Start.

I’m noticing that what’s working for me is focused attention to the moment. First, we decide in our minds that something needs to be done. More often than not our minds are telling us that 100 things need to be done. So there’s no shortage of decisions of the “what” that needs to be done.

When I’m being fully present I can no longer ignore that the dishes are piling up. Sure, I also need to write and work and, and, and… But, this is where surrender comes into play. I choose one single task. My intelligent mind will rate the importance of the tasks and sometimes another task IS more important than doing the dishes depending on time constraints. After the decision is made, then comes the hard part. Ha, well, it’s actually not hard at all, but it does take practice: I Need Do Nothing. I surrender. Whatever it takes for me to surrender that’s what it takes to get into the present moment and stay there. A simple thought where I say, “surrender”, is what works for me right now. Given the opportunity, the mind will always take you onto another task and BAM there goes your productivity. If the task is doing dishes, simply do that. Feel the water on your hands, smell the soap, watch the suds and hear the birds out the window, garbage truck in the alley or buzzing of your fridge. You can even incorporate taste if you want to but there’s no need to put anything into your mouth, just taste your tongue.

Use all of your senses to help you focused on the moment. The mind will be doing all sorts of funny things: having imaginary conversations about something deemed important, remembering conversations from the recent past or telling you there’s other things that need to be done RIGHT NOW. Let the thoughts come, you can’t stop them and you never will stop them from coming that’s the mind’s job and it does it very well. Just pay attention and then surrender them. I’ve even come up with a mental shorthand for myself. Whenever I’m having an imaginary conversation with someone in my head I notice it for what it is, say to myself, “I.C.” (imaginary conversation), then simply, “Surrender”. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn’t. If I have to I’ll repeat it again 5 seconds later.

This surrendering that I’m talking about is linked to what I was expressing in the article You Need Do Nothing. When I’m doing the dishes my mind wants to work. My mind feels proud of itself for being such a hard worker and it never wants to stop. It feels that if it stops working then nothing will get done. That’s the paradox. By getting your mind to stop working, by enforcing a break, you will be more productive. Do Nothing and the dishes get done. Your body already knows how to do dishes. There’s no need to figure out a plan for the future of clean dishes. There’s no need to evaluate the past of previous times when the dishes got done. In the Now everything is done. That’s present moment productivity.

Eckhart Tolle says a lot of great things about this. I’ve read The Power of Now about 5 times and every time I read it I get more and more from it. In A New Earth he expresses the purpose of being in the moment beautifully:

Whatever you do, you will be doing extraordinarily well, because the doing itself becomes the focal point of your attention. Your doing then becomes a channel through which consciousness enters this world. This means there is quality in what you do, even in the most simple action, like turning pages in the phone book or walking across the room. (p. 265)

Trust yourself. Let the dishes be the most important task for that moment. Focus on the doing of the task. Stay in the moment and pay attention to how the world unfolds before you. Amazingly you’ll find that more and more it will unfold exactly the way you want it to. And the bonus points are that you get to experience the joy of every single moment as you feel the earth beneath your feet, the sun shining in your eyes and the clink of glasses as you purposefully wash each dish and put it away. Now that is inner peace.